Monday, April 06, 2009

AGM write up

So, I got really drunk on Sunday, April the 5th, 2009 AD. But, unfortunately, not drunk enough. So I still remember a little bit of the debacle that was the Blue Hen 2009 AGM.

So around April 1st or 2nd there goes out an announcement about there being a hash starting at Salem Village Square shopping center at 3pm Sunday April 5th. And for about 30-40 minutes there were 20 something people there expecting to go on a Blue Hen Hash that day. Whether or not there was a Blue Hen Hash, you, dear readers, please decide…

Hashers Present:

Title 18 Bitchard
Thfkas STD
Toxic Waste Mounts Me
Troma Queen Bad Lay
Death Wish
Devil Woman
Yeast of Burden Crash Test Dummy
Reach Around (Who got renamed that Day)
Skid Marks
Just Nina (Who got a name that day)
Vaseline Alley
Turkey Bayster Radar
Sand in Strange Places
S + M Man
Mary Fucking Poppins Cleavage to Beaver
Sister Golden Shower
Just Lauren
Beardless Clam

And a couple other people whose names I forgot. But they were all expecting a Blue Hen trail.

About 3:39pm, the Hare Fuk Stik, and another hare, Don Quixote, pull up in the VW bus, to live hare a trail. They had two other Pittsburgh Hashers, Pelvis Chestly and Don
Quixote, live haring the second half. So in this case, 4 hares equaled over 4 times the usual trail length. We give them a 10 minute start, and……..

On! On!
We find trail at Christiana High. We find a check. About an hour later, one of us, Title 18 was able to finally see the marks and found what direction we were supposed to go in.

On! On!
Trail goes about across Salem Church Rd and thru the high tension power lines, and possibly into the woods or into the neighborhood called Gender Woods, it was hard to tell because we had several back checks that completely contradicted each other. Skidmarks breaks out in front of the pack, and eventually gets to the beer stop first. –About an hour or two later. Bad Lay and Crash Test Dummy also disappear, but sniff out part of the trail and follow it backwards to the beer stop.-About 2 or 3 hours later. Radar rides around on his mountain bike and picks up trail somewhere- ditto.

On! On!
Most of the pack follows trail thru Gender Woods neighborhood, and then into the woods behind Gender Woods. The troll of Gender Woods, A Hockessin Hasher named Whickwacker, steps out into his backyard and screams, “Why are you people disturbing my woods?!!” The trail continued thru woods, thorns, and swamp, about 5 or 6 miles of it. Then we reach a clearing, and find ourselves in the middle of Todd Estates 2 and out on
Route 4.

On! On!
We go back in forth across Rt. 4 trying to make sense out of the next back check, until we find true trail that leads us to another back check. 3 or 4 hashers decide 7 miles was enough trail to have without a beer stop, wah! And so they head back to point A, where convieniently there was a bar that was open.

On! On!
Devil Woman and Yeast of Burden, find the true trail going thru Chestnut Hill Estates, and, amazingly!!, over half the pack is able to follow. Down Old Ogle Town Rd we go, under the Amtrak Bridge, across the drainage pond, under a tunnel under the Amtrak Bridge, and finally!!! A fucking beer stop. There thus ends the first part of trail with Fuk Stik and Don Quixote, and a whole lot of beer. Pelvis Chestly and Hung Like this are off haring the second half of the trail, and thus we followed.

On! On!
Trail went on White Clay Creek, behind the Avon Plant, into Harmony Industrial Park, into the neighborhood Harmony Woods, than Dartmouth Woods, then blah, blah, blah ….
I know you guys don’t care, I’ll get to the good stuff soon. Most of us met back at the shopping center and drove to Jaime AKA Food Bitch’s house for the On In.

So we circle up, penalties, awards and all that Jazz. Here’s what I remember….

Reach Around, ran around on trail the whole day with a backpack full of fruity bi
tch drinks, cause he can’t handle real beer. It was that backpack that he wore like a fanny pack, so he was thus renamed: Juicy Fruity Backside Booty.

Just Nina, revealed some type of embarrassing personal secret to somebody, and got named: Wookie Patch. Whatever that means, whatever it is, I haven’t seen it……yet.

And, of course, there were our elections. Here are the results:

Hash Cash: Re-elected for a third consecutive term, Toxic Waste!!!, Because he can count, sort of, and because nobody else wants it.

Hash Harlot: Re-elected for a second consecutive term, Beardless Clam!! Because nobody’s been a better Hash Harlot than BC, and if anybody else tried grabbing my ass like that, I would probably hit them.

Religious Advisor: Elected for the first time at Blue Hen, Skidmarks!!! Because he finally gave up the pen and paper he was using to run circles at the Hockessin Hash. And, since he’s finally about to complete his PHD at U of D and move away in a few months, he defiantly fits in at the Blue Hen Hash.

Hare Razors: There are two now. Vaseline Alley!! and Thfkas!! Because it takes more than the efforts of one to get this hash going again, and those two literally have put in a lot of time and dedication for this group.

GM: We decided we needed to choose some younger blood this time. Turkey Bayster!!!
Because the tall, dark, and apparently s
ingle one, has nothing better to do than be the GM of Blue Hen.

Hash Trash: While I was not elected hash trash, nobody else was either, and therefore there’s nothing any of you can do to stop me, except remember to write it before I do. So, Ha!! Your still stuck with the loud-mouthed Mary Fucking Poppins!!!

And what else happened? Um, Toxic Waste drank a whole bottle of Gold Schlager Peppermint Snapps and once again lived up to his name. Skidmarks had his underoos ripped to shreds by several hashers, and I unfortunately got a glimpse of his bare white ass. A couple of other people got semi naked and re-enacted a gangbang on Pelvis Chestly. All of this, in Food Bitch’s backyard, and, in plain sight of two ten year old girls who were playing in a tree house next door. Some of us met up later at the good Ole’ East End Café, where we partied on some more, and then from there to Fuk Stik’s hotel room, at the Super 8 Motel where we partied on some more. What can I say? Some people needed to take Monday off from work.

All in All it was another shitty, but very memorable, freaking trail!!!!!!

Stay Tuned for the Next Blue Hen Hash hopefully sometime in the next month or two.

On ! On!